Несогласие без конфликта (It's not that …, it's just that …)
Слова урока · 10
- I'm not sure I agree /aɪm ˌnɒt ʃɔːr aɪ əˈɡriː/не уверен, что согласен
- see it differently /ˌsiː ɪt ˈdɪfrəntli/видеть это иначе
- it's not that /ɪts ˌnɒt ˈðæt/дело не в том, что
- it's just that /ɪts ˌdʒʌst ˈðæt/просто
- would it help if /ˌwʊd ɪt ˈhelp ɪf/помогло бы, если
- how would you feel about /ˌhaʊ wʊd juː ˈfiːl əˌbaʊt/как ты отнёсся бы к
- to be honest /tə bi ˈɒnɪst/честно говоря
- get on someone's nerves /ˌɡet ɒn ˌsʌmwʌnz ˈnɜːvz/действовать на нервы
- meet halfway /ˌmiːt ˌhɑːfˈweɪ/пойти навстречу, найти середину
- clear the air /ˌklɪə ði ˈeə/разрядить обстановку, объясниться
Несогласие без конфликта: смягчить оценку и предложить выход
Несогласие на B2 — не «you're wrong», а три шага: смягчённое несогласие (I'm not sure I agree; I see it slightly differently), точная причина без обвинения (it's not that …, it's just that …) и предложение выхода в форме вопроса (Would it help if …? How would you feel about …?). Обобщения (always, never, you people) — вон.
| шаг | обороты | пример |
|---|---|---|
| 1. смягчить | I'm not sure I agree. · I see it slightly differently. · I take your point, but … · With respect, … | I see it slightly differently. |
| 2. причина без обвинения | It's not that …, it's just that … · To be honest, … · The thing that bothers me is … | It's not that I mind the music. It's just that I get up at six. |
| 3. выход вопросом | Would it help if we …? · How would you feel about + -ing? · What if we …? · Could we meet halfway? | How would you feel about headphones after ten? |
| 4. закрыть | Let's clear the air. · I'm glad we talked. · Deal? | I'm glad we cleared the air. |
Смягчители
| средство | резко | мягко |
|---|---|---|
| slightly / a bit / rather | I disagree. | I see it slightly differently. |
| I'm not sure + that … | That's not true. | I'm not sure that's quite right. |
| вопрос вместо утверждения | Turn it down. | Would it help if we set a time? |
| «я» вместо «ты» | You're so noisy. | I find it hard to sleep with the music on. |
| склонность вместо ярлыка | You never clean. | You tend to leave the washing-up till the morning. |
It's not that …, it's just that …
| снимает | называет |
|---|---|
| It's not that I don't like your friends, | it's just that I need some quiet on weeknights. |
| It's not that you're wrong, | it's just that the timing is bad. |
| It's not the music, | it's the time. |
Смягчение: резко → мягко
| средство | резко | мягко |
|---|---|---|
| вводная фраза | You're wrong. | I'm not sure I agree. / I see it slightly differently. |
| наречие-смягчитель | That's expensive. | That's a bit / rather / slightly expensive. |
| отрицание вместо утверждения | It's a bad plan. | It's not the best plan. / I'm not convinced it'll work. |
| would вместо is | That is a problem. | That would be a problem. |
| вопрос вместо утверждения | We should wait. | Wouldn't it be better to wait? |
| снять личное | You're being unfair. | It's not that I don't trust you, it's just that we need more time. |
Схема: It's not that … , it's just that …
| часть | функция | пример |
|---|---|---|
| It's not that + предложение | снимает обидное толкование | It's not that I don't like the idea, … |
| it's just that + предложение | называет настоящую причину | … it's just that we can't afford it right now. |
| выход | предложение | What if we started smaller? |
Сравните с русским: «не то чтобы…, просто…» — точный аналог It's not that…, it's just that…; «немного дорого» — a bit expensive; «я бы сказал» — I'd say (смягчает любое утверждение).
Нюансы
- To be honest — сигнал, что дальше неприятное, но искреннее; не злоупотребляйте, иначе всё остальное звучит неискренне.
- get on my nerves — разговорно; в нейтральной речи — it bothers me / I find it hard.
- How would you feel about + -ing (about moving, about headphones): предложение, а не приказ.
- meet halfway — каждый уступает часть; clear the air — обсудить накопившееся, чтобы снять напряжение.
push_pinсмягчить: I'm not sure I agree, I see it slightly differently; причина без обвинения: it's not that …, it's just that …, to be honest; выход вопросом: would it help if …?, how would you feel about + -ing?, meet halfway; закрыть: clear the air; «я» вместо «ты», склонность вместо ярлыка
Фразы урока · 7
- I'm not sure I agree with that.Не уверен, что с этим согласен.
- I see it slightly differently.Я вижу это немного иначе.
- It's not that I mind the music. It's just that I get up at six.Дело не в том, что мне мешает музыка. Просто я встаю в шесть.
- Would it help if we set a time?Помогло бы, если бы мы договорились о времени?
- How would you feel about headphones after ten?Как ты отнёсся бы к наушникам после десяти?
- To be honest, the dripping tap gets on my nerves.Честно говоря, капающий кран действует мне на нервы.
- Can we meet halfway? Let's clear the air.Можем найти середину? Давай объяснимся.
lightbulbНесогласие в три шага: I see it slightly differently → it's not that …, it's just that … → Would it help if …? / How would you feel about …? Говорите «я», а не «ты всегда».
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